


Want Not

by owltype



Category: DBSK | Tohoshinki | TVfXQ | TVXQ, JYJ (Band)
Genre: M/M, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-31
Updated: 2016-01-31
Packaged: 2018-05-17 10:50:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5866522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/owltype/pseuds/owltype
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jaejoong wants Junsu. Thankfully, Junsu wants him, too.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Want Not

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you, heros-wings, for all of your help!

The rhythmic patter of water hitting porcelain can’t drown out the sounds Junsu is making.

 _Kill me now_ , Jaejoong thinks, his ear pressed against the wood of the door, his hand pressed to his navel, his chest tight with want.

It’s wrong, he knows. _Sick_ , really. And dangerous. The others could walk in at any time, would see him practically rutting against the door frame, shamelessly and shamefully listening to Junsu jerk off in the shower.

But, god, Jaejoong _wants_.

Has wanted for a long time. Almost since he learned what that really means. Junsu is beautiful with his stupid hair and his stupid face and his stupid body….Jaejoong wants Junsu like he needs air to breathe. Wants Junsu beside him, against him, inside of him.

From the other side of the door comes a high, keening moan and Jaejoong’s knees nearly buckle. He knows what’s happening, can practically see it, and it’s just not _fair_. Jaejoong wants to be in there to catch those sounds in his mouth and replace Junsu’s hand with his own or better yet, slide to his knees and wrap his lips around the head of Junsu’s cock; wants to feel Junsu’s hands in his hair and watch as Junsu throws his head back against the shower wall; wants to taste Junsu.

Jaejoong muffles a strangled noise into the crook of his elbow as he cums in his pants without ever having been touched. How embarrassing. How _pathetic_.

“If you had waited, _hyung_ , I could’ve given you a hand with that,” a smug voice whispers against the curve of his ear and Jaejoong jumps backwards into a very solid body.

“Changmin.” Jaejoong doesn’t need to see who it is to know. Nobody can say “hyung” as condescendingly as Changmin.

“How embarrassing for you,” Changmin continues, voice still smug, breath still tickling the hair at Jaejoong’s nape.

Jaejoong turns and shoves Changmin away from him. Changmin laughs and steps back to lean against the far wall, eyes appraising and lips quirked in a cocky smirk.

“So. Are you ever going to tell Junsu about this little problem of yours?”

“Shut up,” Jaejoong mumbles. “What do you know?”

“I know enough to not get caught,” Changmin says.

“Caught?” Jaejoong asks, confused. Sure, Changmin had seen him and yeah, that’s embarrassing and potentially problematic but nothing Jaejoong can’t handle. He can just threaten Changmin with blackmail; he has enough dirt on the kid to make things difficult for him.

Jaejoong is just about to tell him so, but Changmin is no longer looking at him, his gaze focused instead on something past Jaejoong’s shoulder. It’s then that Jaejoong realizes he can no longer hear the shower running.

Jaejoong’s stomach drops to somewhere below his knees. He turns slowly on his heel to face Junsu.

“Well, Jaejoong. Here’s your chance for that heart-to-heart,” Changmin says, his voice strained like he’s having trouble breathing.

Jaejoong hopes he suffocates.

“Hyung, what--” Junsu stops, takes in Jaejoong's flushed face, his trembling fingers, the wet patch on the front of Jaejoong's pants.

Changmin makes a sound like a small explosion and collapses in a fit of laugher. Jaejoong wants to kick him but his body feels as though it’s been petrified.

Junsu’s look of bewilderment slowly morphs into something like…amusement? Interest? Jaejoong doesn’t know and he doesn’t care, all he knows is that he needs to get away. So he turns tail and runs like the coward he is, runs away from Changmin and away from Junsu. _Especially_ away from Junsu, who he will never be able to face again.

\-----

“You should have kissed him,” Yoochun says hours later.

“What? No! And be laughed at even _more_?!” Jaejoong asks incredulously. “I mean, okay. Junsu wasn’t laughing but he _will_. After he gets over his disgust. Oh my god, I’m never going to live this down.”

“Jae--”

“This is probably going to ruin our friendship. This is probably going to ruin the _band_.”

“ _Jaejoong--_ ”

“ _The band_ , Yoochun!”

“Dude, it’s after midnight. I’m going to sleep. Go talk to Junsu about this.”

“You’re a terrible friend. How can you sleep at a time like this when I am talking about the potential disbandment of--”

“ _Go_ ,” Yoochun says and shoves Jaejoong out the door, shutting it behind him.

Jaejoong tries to re-enter the room, but Yoochun has locked the door, leaving him standing awkwardly in the middle of the hall. He briefly considers banging on the door and demanding Yoochun let him in to _their bedroom_ , but decides against it. The last thing he needs is to be caught in another embarrassing situation.

Tired and stressed out, Jaejoong wanders around the apartment. He goes to the bathroom to splash some water on his face, stops in the kitchen for a glass of water, re-arranges the pillows in the living room and organizes their video games. He considers asking Yunho if he can crash on the floor of his room because their small couch just isn’t conducive to restful sleep but the light filtering down the hallway from the small studio distracts him.

He moves down the hallway to see who’s still awake, and to lecture them to bed. He pushes open the door but his words die in his throat when he sees Junsu sitting at the piano, chin resting in his hand and contemplating the wall.

Junsu doesn’t react to his presence and Jaejoong breathes a little easier. He could run away right now and avoid a whole lot of awkward conversation. But damn it, Yoochun was right. He needs to have this out with Junsu.

Jaejoong steps into the room and quietly shuts the door behind him. Junsu starts and turns to look at him.

“Jaejoong,” Junsu says, his voice guarded. “What are you doing here?”

“I need to talk to you,” Jaejoong says softly, forcing himself to speak through the knot in his throat. “About what happened this afternoon.”

Junsu doesn’t react, just continues to look at Jaejoong, the emotions swirling in his eyes indecipherable.

“First, I wanted to apologize,” Jaejoong says. “That was…weird of me, to do that thing. And wrong.”

Still nothing from Junsu. Jaejoong’s nervousness increases ten-fold and he drops his gaze from Junsu’s, talks to the floor instead because it’s easier that way. “I want to explain though. I’ve kind of had--” Jaejoong stops, takes a deep breath, pushes on. “I’ve kind of had…feelings for you. For a long time. And I don’t really know what to do with myself anymore because they’re kind of driving me crazy— _you’re_ kind of driving me crazy and--”

“Jaejoong,” Junsu says, stopping the tirade. “You mentioned feelings?”

“Yeah,” Jaejoong says, forcing himself to look at Junsu. “Of the…not-friends kind.”

Junsu looks at him exasperatedly.

“I _like_ like you,” Jaejoong chokes out and god, he feels so dumb, so _juvenile_ but he said it and yeah, he’s scared as hell that Junsu is going to reject him because sure, he’ll get over it eventually but it’s going to hurt like hell for a while—but there’s also relief in putting his feelings out there, like a weight has been lifted from his chest.

Junsu says nothing, just stands up from the piano bench and moves towards Jaejoong. Jaejoong watches him approach, butterflies of apprehension and hope and the ever-present _want_ warring in his chest. He feels like he’s going to be sick, feels like he can’t breathe, and maybe this was a stupid idea, maybe he shouldn’t have listened to Yoochun.

Junsu stops in front of him, says, “Hyung, breathe,” then grabs Jaejoong by the back of the neck and pulls him into a kiss. Jaejoong’s heart stops then explodes. He makes some embarrassing noise and brings his arms up to wrap around Junsu’s shoulders, losing himself in the feeling of Junsu’s lips on his own and Junsu’s body against his.

Gently, Junsu pulls away from Jaejoong. Jaejoong bemoans the loss and blearily opens his eyes to look at Junsu questioningly.

“I like like you too,” Junsu says.

“That’s good,” Jaejoong says a little breathlessly, a little light-headed with feelings of _oh thank god_ and _YAY._

“And next time, just join me in the shower,” Junsu whispers against Jaejoong’s lips.

Jaejoong laughs. “Well, you know,” he says coyly, toying with the fringed edges of Junsu’s hair. “Yoochun locked me out of our room so I’m in need of a place to stay tonight.”

Junsu’s gaze darkens. “I think we can figure something out,” he says.


End file.
